Blog

Finding Passion after Pain

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Friday, 10 November 2006 00:00

A wise person I know said "after the pain comes the passion." It is a paradox that traumatically painful life events can be followed by periods of indescribable joy and opportunity. True, we do have to go through the pain first! But on the other side, we have a chance to realize our true passions as we "come alive." Even in the deepest darkest hour, our greatest passions lie just around the corner.

Team Work

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Saturday, 07 October 2006 00:00

The work of a collaborative team is hard! Couples choosing the collaborative process will discover many rewards, albeit with corresponding responsibilities. In collaborative process, you have to "show up!" Giving thought to high end goals; striving to communicate in effective ways; completing homework items; and believing that all things are possible: All will help move you more successfully toward deep resolution. But, you are not alone! Your collaborative team is behind you: Guiding; informing; supporting; strategizing; listening; questioning; caring. It's all in the teamwork...

Challenging the 'Zone

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Monday, 18 September 2006 00:00

How do you respond to opportunities or invitations to move beyond your comfort zone? It can be hard to embrace new ways. Our comfort zones are, well, comfortable. That's where our safety and security come from: the known; the familiar; the predictable. But our safety zone is also a launch pad for the Unknown. Terra Firma if we need to hurry back from having gone too far. The really great part is, once we move beyond our comfort zone our comfort zone expands and grows with us! How cool is that? It is as simple as choosing to doing something awkward, scary, or unfamiliar. Uncharted places in our life-maps are waiting. Put on your explorer hat and I'll see you out there…

From Courage to Change

Written by Maggie M. Wyer Thursday, 03 August 2006 00:00

"Experience is not what happens to you, it is what you do with what happens to you." Aldous Huxley
Many times the negative aspects of our past seem to dominate the present and we dwell on the past, rather than learn from the experience. The past offers many gifts, for instance, making a different, wiser choice when the same experience arises. It has been said "Take a look at the past, but don’t stare."
Focusing so much on the past means we miss out on the wonderful, sometimes life changing, experiences of the present.

Life is Full of Wonders!

Written by Maggie M. Wyer Wednesday, 19 July 2006 00:00

Just when your life settles into a routine, not many surprises are forthcoming. You have your routine around work, family, friends. Then the most wonderful thing happens, a new life appears. My husband and I are experiencing our first grandchild, a baby girl named Abigail. We are fortunate enough to be daycare for Abby on Mondays. Oh, my gosh! Our routine is shot to hell in a hand basket, but, oh, my gosh, the wonder of seeing things for the first time through Abigail's eyes, pictures on the wall, flowers, colors, music (Abigail loves Lyle Lovett), trees, a ride in the car.
Just when you least expect it, life is full of wonders!

Opening

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Monday, 12 June 2006 00:00

How does it feel when your heart opens up? There's that lump in your throat, and the weak knees. The stomach flip-flops and catching your breath as the emotion makes you gasp. The uncontrollable welling up of tears - tears of joy and gratefulness. The sense of connectedness to all humanity that ever was or ever will be. Open and overflowing. Helpless beyond all reason, yet powerful beyond measure. That's how it feels to me. How do we get our hearts to open wide? Be still. Slow down. Look for tiny bits of gratitude, and love. When you get a glimpse, stay with it. Grow it, expand it, nourish it. You, too, can savor the sweetness and belong to it.

Finding a Whole (Hole?)

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Friday, 19 May 2006 00:00

Have you ever noticed how slowly a really bad situation can creep up on you? You think everything is fine. But little by little, bit by bit you're SINKING. Suddenly you're eye-level with the dirt wondering where the soaring heights you used to see from have gone. You never even recognize what hit you; it happened in slow motion. And when you are finally back out in the light you almost can't believe the fragmented parts you thought were a whole. The next time I find myself ""down in the hole" I will look UP: to see the hands of family and friends outstretched to help me back into the light. And, I will look BACK: to find the wisdom and gifts to take away with me from the experience.

How good does life get?

Written by Holly M. Hohlbein Wednesday, 17 May 2006 00:00

Calls from beloved family members. A handmade "penny purse." Champagne on the patio, in the sunshine with the Sunday NY Times spread out around me. A sumptuous brunch that I didn't have to cook or clean up from. An actual thank you, from a teenager, for "13 years of happiness." Kayaking through Mercer Slough, out-paddling my children, younger and stronger than me (OK, so they gave me a head start), not to mention the duck families and blue herons. Home-grilled hot dogs and hamburgers, eaten amidst the laughter of kids outdoing each other on the trampoline. Giftcards of books and coffee. The blessings of being loved and appreciated. How was your Mother's Day?

Freedom

Written by Maggie M. Wyer Tuesday, 09 May 2006 00:00

"Today I will remember that uncertainty is not a fault but an opportunity. Everything I do and everything that crosses my path---people, situations, ideas---all have the potential to contribute to my growth and understanding." From Courage to Change

On a daily basis, I need to remember that I can learn from uncertainty. I don't always have to have the answer. Freeing, isn't it?

It's All About Me

Written by Maggie M. Wyer Saturday, 06 May 2006 00:00

"We cannot tell what may happen to us in the strange medley of life. But we can decide what happens in us---how we can take it, what we do with it---and that is what really counts in the end." Joseph Fort Newman---from Courage to Change

I am not responsible for what other people say or do. I am only responsible for my reaction to it. I am responsible for me.